I think this sucks, but apparently it doesn't...

Sorry if i'm a litte too offensive.
It really isn't just the way i am.
We say that life is just an observation
Of everything we never truly want (and what we need)
So i'll give you my own little observations
On how life is supposed to be.

Scream enough when you are born,
For life to already hate you.
A quiet baby's a dead one - and the bath water's already waiting.
Smiles and cute innocence, will get you through childhood.
In adolescence you split in two:
Rebellious, drunken slut.
Studious, stoned whore.
Or a Can-Can hybrid.

I'm now more open to life - I've tasted it and seen it
So, of course, i want it
More than i fucking know i need it.

Monty said to me it was awfully nice to have a cock.
I disagree (but that's just me) - a kitty is much more my style
*wink wink nudge nudge*
I'd like to take a ride (down the street and back) with you.
I'd pull you into my car
We'd fight over who's steering.
Rhumba across a dancefloor - that sexy dance of love.
It's quite boring if you don't mean it
I mean it, but never danced like i have.
Mostly because sex on a dancefloor's not legal.
Heaven knows i stick to the law (if nothing else).

Another little pretty observation:
In a lecture no one gives a shit.
A microcosm of Australia.
Are you attending?
Who fucking cares!
Let's go get a drink.

I will drink vodka, but prefer my beer.
A connoisseur of lager,
Though i know nothing about it.
Let me prove i can hold my drink.
After that i'll balance the bottles into an artwork and auction it off.

I'll make a fortune (hopefully) from my drunken art.
Go and hide on an island when the world pisses me off.
I've already done that (metaphorically) and discovered i really hate the world.
Yet i put up with the world - i know it cannot be changed.
Not by me.

Here's to all life's observations - be they big or small.
Here's to us and us and them - whoever we may be.
Here's to drink and drunken love - rhumba in a car with me.