NuvoleDiPensieri

Epilogue (A Wzrd Rock Song)

2010-11-19T02:41:00.000-08:00

Harry stepped out on the platform
Looked up and spotted the train
He cast his mind back for a moment
To memories that still remain

A little boy looked out in wonder
Thought, "How could this really be true?"
Harry's eyes came back to focus
On his son and he wondered anew

(Chorus)
This is the end of the journey
This is the very last page
Go read it again
And cry at the end
We know that our story won't age

Ginny held tight to his hand and
Thought of the man that he'd become
He was older, sure, but at heart he's
The boy who was the Chosen One

Her brother and sister shared looks of love
And their children talked excitedly
Her husband shed tears of pride and joy
As he watched his family

(Bridge)
On life goes
But no one knows
What is written beyond these words

We still fight
To the delight
Of these Harry Potter nerds

Melting! or, Behold! Summer has all but arrived (a song)

2010-11-12T22:25:00.000-08:00

The Wicked Witch of the West
Was here today
She ordered a milkshake to go

A chocolate and caramel
Swirl of fun it
Was quite the creation you know

And then as she left on her
Wicked Witch quest
Her green eyes to me she did show

(And I said)
I'm melting!
I'm melting!
My heart melts for you
Elphaba, dear don't you see?

I'm melting!
I'm melting!
My lady it's true
My heart dear, it melts just for you!

Lou dropped by for breakfast this
Halloween morn
His poison was eggs and bacon

He lounged and he joked and he
Polished his horns
And tallied up his forsaken

As his bill he did pay, his
Glasses removed
I caught his eyes and was taken

(And screamed)
I'm burning!
I'm burning!
My soul burns for you
Lou, my old chum, don't you see?

I'm burning!
I'm burning!
My devil, it's true
My soul dear, it burns just for you!

The Wicked Witch of the West
Returned just then
And scolded old Lou for his cheek

His sunnies returned to his head
And he paid
Laughing as he left this ol' creek

The witch turned to me and leaned
Forward with glee
And winked as I did catch a peek

(And we sang)
I'm melting!
I'm melting!
My heart melts for you
Dear pretty please can't you see?

I'm melting!
I'm melting!
My lady it's true
My heart dear, it melts just for you!

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

The above is an example of what happens when you combine a nine hour shift in a hot, humid and not very busy cafe/restaurant with the desire to write about said cafe/restaurant. Where Elphaba came from is anyone's guess. Lou is the devil character on Guitar Hero III; I figure if he's going to take any morning off, it'll be Halloween. I'm exhausted.

Jenny (a song)

2010-11-11T05:46:00.000-08:00

Jenny wakes up in the morning
Her heart is a-go
She dresses and looks in the mirr'r and
Says, "Yes dear, I know."

Her bus trundles by to the
Traffic's ebb and flow
She watches the people inside
As it starts to snow

She thinks about all that she is
And if all of it shows
She looks in their eyes and wonders
If anyone knows

Jenny greets and smiles wide and
Continues her work
It's tedious, timely and tough
And sends her berserk

Complaints met with smiles as she
Tries not to be a jerk
But she wonders if he really knows what
He means by 'berk'

When tea-time arrives she rejoices
And turns the page
For the rest of the night she is free
To take to the stage

All pretty and perfectly her
Yet much more sage
Again watch the world as it does
Something more than age

Jeremiah steps into the light
Through the side stage door
He throws his arms wide and he smirks as
He hears his applause

He sings and he rhymes and expounds
On his favourite cause
The performance is so convincing
It gives her pause

She thinks about all that he is
And if all of it shows
They look in his eyes and she wonders
If anyone knows

Jenny wakes up in the morning
Her heart still a-go
She yawns and she looks in the mirr'r
And smiles just so

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

For the first time in a really long time, I wrote (what appears to be) the entire piano part for a song I had only the vaguest idea about. These lyrics came mostly yesterday, but the piano grabbed me and thrust me toward the keys two days ago. It was quite thrilling.

Edge of Sober (Ode to the Queer Revue After Party)

2010-08-29T03:13:00.000-07:00

As the witching hour passes
Take this chance and fill your glasses
Friends depart and friends return
Play your part and wait your turn

Share you hearts, share your minds
Share the love and share the lies
Heartbreak, wonder, joy and tears
Darling tell me all your fears

Philosophy lines, fine dining and wines
Publicity wires and new bald tyres
At the end of the line and wattle
I've reached the bottom of my water bottle

Shout out! Get me a man
For my man, if you can
Cat get back and watch the track
If you'll make up for all you lack

Six foot and blonde and a doctor to boot
Leave me my pirates to handle the loot
Next choice not a suit, but a lawyer up North
And dream the dream, from this day forth

Is it time now for eggs, as daylight ascends?
Or wait one more moment, to pass the bends
Hold another, with a Bushell of tea
Let some pale sunlight wash over me

As the stumbles away this happy morn
Leave us not feeling any more forlorn
We'll wave goodbye today and to you
And revel in the memory of our little revue

Only one person allowed per cubicle (a song, as yet without melody)

2010-08-12T04:46:00.000-07:00

We meet

I see your eyes
and I'm lost
I hear your voice
and I swoon
I feel your touch
and I quiver

Press against me
and speak
I feel your gaze
and I'm weak
Kiss me
and I'm yours

(chorus)
Make love to me
Tonight
Or let me stare
I want, want you
Tonight
And I don't care where

I revel in the feel
Of your hands
Against me

Tell me
How do I feel
Against you?

This fuel-soaked night
Is only
Perfect

Still my slowly racing mind
Demands it again, free
From influence
(just to be sure)

(chorus)

Days on it won't
Escape me
Yet you do

When did reality
Become so
Surreal?

Now that we Know
One another, do we
Deserve each other?

Should it even matter, when
I finally have a tale
That makes me smile?

(chorus)

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Just guess what I'm writing about here :P

I've no idea what the melody or rhythm will be, or whether it's as emotive as I'd like it to be.

Legally, the word is 'Statutory' (a song)

2010-07-04T08:04:00.000-07:00

Chorus
Darling baby girl
Let me rock your world
You are oh so sweet to me
Let me taste you’ll love you’ll see

Verse
Dear little girl
I love, don’t you see?
Why do you place trust
In him over me?

I know that you love with
Reckless abandon
But watch what I’ll do
If he puts his hands on (you)

Ch x2
(Second time) So just give in to it please, please

Verse
How do you know him?
Does he treat you like a lady?
Age may be a number but in the end,
Numbers are all he’ll have

Don’t think I will hesitate
To knock him down a peg or two
If he thinks that he can pull that
Smooth guy crap on you

Ch x1

Bridge
It doesn’t matter how
Cute you think he is
He’s just the same as
All the other fish

So throw him back
Don’t reel him in
Don’t you forget
You’re still a kid

Darling baby girl
He will not rock your world
He might be oh so sweet right now
But does he love you anyhow (oh)

Darling baby girl
Don’t let him touch your world
He ain’t so sweet, in the end
What kind of message does that send?

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Winter greetings y'all! I bring this gift, to keep thee warm.

Firstly, I should point out that there are two characters in this piece. The main chorus is a man, who is pursuing a young girl. The rest of the song (including the last two choruses) is voiced by someone the girl knows, who is aware of the man's attentions and feels them to be less than pure (maybe even nefarious). The tale is cautionary; it questions the motives of the man and asks the girl to see beyond her initial attraction to him, or let go of the attraction altogether. It also plainly states that the main voice is uncomfortable with the situation.

On a personal note, I find myself uncomfortable when teenagers deliberately sexualise themselves. I understand that adolescence is a time of physical and emotional upheaval (I did go through it myself, and not too long ago). The feeling of being between worlds, the 'sex, drugs and rock'n'roll' attitude, the feeling of invincibility. You're allowed to call someone hot simply because you think they are. You can do all kinds of new things, seemingly without consequence. The reality is that there are consequences. Often, we learn this the hard way. People cannot always be called 'friend'. Some 'friends' are less than they seem. Some 'friends' will hurt you, in the worst ways imaginable. I fear for the teenagers I know, especially those who go out of their way to point out their burgeoning sexuality. It's unnecessary and is not a flattering advertisement of oneself. It leaves one open to all forms of attack and that attack, when it comes, will not be enjoyable. It will hurt and it will linger. We are human, after all.

We are not invincible.

Vera

2010-05-07T19:31:00.000-07:00

She saw you
And she liked your smile
She liked your hair
She liked your voice

When your eyes
Were focused on her
Her heart, it beat
An extra mile

She knew how
To be your best friend
But she never really knew you
In the end

What if she
Were your perfect lady?
Why would you act
So very shady?

(Chorus)
Doesn't she love you?
Now you can see
Ignore her again
And then you'll be free

Light up her life
Just let her stare
Let go forev'r or
She'll burn from the glare

Another day
And another you
Walks by and
There she goes again

She's fallen
In love for
The very next time
Forgive her, it's you

She sees you
And she likes your smile
you there will make her
Swoon for a while

Leave her be
Heartbreak's not new
Nothing is special
or diff'rent about you

(Chorus)

She smiles at you
And you won't know why
She'll smile at you
'Til the day you die

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Something about this feels unfinished. And it came out simpler than I would have liked. I'm not sure I conveyed everything I wanted to here. It's about sadness; seeing someone, hoping, but ultimately knowing you'll never have them, and it still hurting when you know for sure. How cruel it is to be indifferent, or fearful of someone's love. Did I succeed?

P.S. No, I'm not feeling all depressed or anything, I just had a desire to get this out =]

Field Trip (Cromellin Research Station)

2010-04-14T04:20:00.000-07:00

Rustic
and Musty
and Trust me
This is where you want to get lost

Flower
a Frond
and a Ficus
Nature at no little cost

Today
and Tomorrow
and Tuesday
Research or Bushwalk around

Leeches
and Lichens
and Laurels
Look out! Paranoia abounds

Kookaburra
My mother
You turkey!
Firelight for a possum's feast

Spot
Hot eyes
and a Waterfall
Beachy-o just to the East

To the
Left is an
Arboretum
Where the natives are out of place

Take one
Last tun to
The Lookout
Fix this field trip in time and space

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

I had so much fun on the field trip last weekend! We walked through a few National Parks on Saturday, went spotlighting after a bbq that night and had pop-quizzes every few metres on the way to the Lookout on Sunday. By Sunday, we weren't even fazed by Murray asking, "What's this?" I'd had two bottles of cider with dinner on Saturday, so I wasn't quite as afraid of the dark as I usually am. Also, everyone had rather powerful torches. And I actually *spotted* something (an insect).

Lady

2010-04-03T01:35:00.000-07:00

Lady
Sitting next to me tonight
Lady
I must say, you're quite a sight

I wonder where you came from
I wonder who you are
I wonder what you're wondering
And have wandered thus far

Might you be a drama queen
With your big shiny black eyes
Might you be a dancer
With your lean and strong thighs

I fear that I shall never know
And fear to know for sure
So please stay swathed in silence
And leave me just as poor

Lady
Sitting next to me tonight
Lady
Taking up my every sight

I still wonder where you're coming from
And wonder where you've been
I wonder what you're wondering
And wonder what you've seen

-_|-_|-_|-_|-_|-_|-_|-_|-_|-_|-_|-_|-_|-_|-_|-_|-_|

This one's another song. The structure is whack, nothing like the written structure, I don't actually know what I'm calling the chorus or whatever. I started writing it in class one day (because that's how riveting this lecturer was; at least, I was bored with being told how wrong you can be) and finished writing it in another lecture (see previous parentheses).

Cliche`

2010-03-29T18:16:00.000-07:00

Gossiping Gossipers Gossip
And Gossips are all the same

Girls are a cat and a kitten
And chit and chat for the fame

Mothers talk up a drink and their kids
Disparaging all but their own

Boys are a pose and a poser
And have knowledge of all that is known

Fathers rub dub and robust
With discussion around a hearse

All in all we are finicky folk
Ruling the universe

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

I seem to be inspired whenever there's a ballroom competition. I find myself becoming more and more disillusioned with the politicking and the sniping and the gossiping that goes on, even outside of competition. It's never really hit me just what parents (especially mothers) are capable of, when it comes to their children's success. My parents have always been more concerned with teaching my brother and I to fight our own battles, and I feel it's been worthwhile, particularly as there are many areas of my life where my parents have absolutely no influence. Like ballroom. I am the dancer and I am involved with the club and I have to take responsibility for my participation in the sport. This means the onus is on me to get up and dance; other people have their mothers to remind them (and often, yell at them). To a certain extent, I feel this makes me a better competitor, if I stuff up, I have no one to blame but myself. Again, unlike others, who can blame their partner for not practising enough (when really, they continually fend off their partner's suggestion of practise) or their parents (when their parents are moving mountains and oceans so have a chance at success) or the judges (stuck up old men, usually) or whomever chooses the music (it's all wrong, you can't dance to that!).

So while you might say that the above poem is too harsh and does not accurately represent your stereotypical view of people, those stereotypes do exist. The only way we can prove this poem wrong is by active non-conformance to said stereotypes and by not expecting others to conform.

The Shrieking Shack

2010-03-16T04:31:00.000-07:00

There is a house in Hogsmeade town
They call the Shrieking Shack
(and) It's been the ruin, of many a poor boy
Their stories I here tell back

My name is RJ Lupin
I am a Wolfsman's son
My monthly home for 7 long years
When disappeared the sun

The village is still wary
Of the house upon the hill
After 7 years of torture there
It still gives me a chill

My name is Mr Black
I lived there for a time
And only Crookshanks knew me
For he could ring my chime

My godson came to visit
I told him my story
And after the flight of Wormtail
I said I was sorry

And I, the last to speak here
My name: Severus Snape
This Shack, it was my downfall
Death came in his black cape

The Dark Lord, he did summon
Me here to his side
The battle raged at Hogwarts
But here is where I died

There is a house in Hogsmeade town
Today we have gone back
Remember those whose ruin
Lays in the Shrieking Shack

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

Yay! A song without parentheses in the title!

I do have a few other covers floating around in my mind, all yet to be written.

Endless Summer (Song of the Ghost, Part I)

2010-03-16T04:24:00.000-07:00

These quiet hallways
Seem so endless,
Dust on ev'ry sill

Unbroken sunlight
Streams through windows,
Bask and have your fill

A few physical
Bodies present,
More is there the Ghost

Disturb ye not now
The Teachers,
Spirits raise a toast

(Chorus)
This is the summer of the endless life
The summer of the Ghost
This is the summer of the endless life
The summer of the Ghost

Meet in the dungeon
Ye revellers,
Oh so strong and hardy

Putrid fish for all
And music,
Let's make it a party!

(Chorus)

(Guitar solo?)

(Bridge)
These two months won't last forever
They will come again
We the Ghosts do have forever
Outlast the Age of Men

These two months of peace we claim
Without students to mock
In these two months that do remain
We come and we shall rock!

(Chorus)x2

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

This is the anthemic/giant pop! number. Drums and guitars and clapping and cheering and loudloudloud singing and passion. And Ghosts.

Helena and the Baron (a love song)

2010-03-16T04:18:00.000-07:00

A WzrdRock song

Follow me darkly
and quietly
Into the woods
and beyond

This dream appears
so beautifully
At last and you
defend

Imprint me forever
by your side
To watch and wait
and wend

Return to chilly
Hogwarts
Where another
lifetime ends

Carry me quickly
and quietly
Over the threshold
and on

Be mine across
this Highland
Be you and mine
anon

Revelry parts none
as avarice
Jealousy lingers
on

The strong are staid
and stalwart
The weak be
poised to run

Bury me deeply
and quietly
Into the earth
and above

Terror before
and tower
Bloody and more
the dove

Anguish gives none
to loss
Grief fits like
a glove

Bloody my heart
forever
And I be yours
my Love

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

This one is quite possibly my favourite, so far. It is a piano song, and I tend to get a little carried away when playing.

Choir Desperado (featuring Sir Nick)

2010-03-16T04:14:00.000-07:00

A WzrdRock song

Hey hey hey
I'll say say say
That beheading crim'nal folk
Is not the way way way

I know that ain't a reason
For you to go appeasing
It is that timely season
To feel a bit like treason (but)

(Chorus)
Forty-five blows
With a blunt axe shows
That you cannot trust a murderer
To murder on cue

Hey hey hey
I say say say
We need to question conviction
Today day day

We shall raise a mighty chorus
Even though you may deplore us
Don't be a brontosaurus
We will cheer and you will hear us ('cause)

(Chorus)

It was so very long ago
But my beheading, it does show
That Medieval foolishness
Will simply not impress

(I am) A patron of the Virtue
Courage, Pride and Love
And while my death was long, not painless
It forever will extol this

Take heart my fellow magic folk
While I carry on my painful yoke
Rebellious fires we doth stoke
To give evil a great big poke!

(Chorus)

How do I love Thee? (unfinished?)

2010-03-16T03:15:00.000-07:00

Love, love, love
I see you struttin'
through the door
and I say
Hey, hey, hey
When you infect me
just once more

It's not quite fair
When I don't
Even exist in
Your eyes

(Chorus)
Look my lovely
I am begging for
(and oh) Speak my honey
We could take much more
(and oh!) Love my baby
Or walk back out the door

Flash, flash, flash
That long
red hair
and
Push, push, push
Me to see
you there

Harden your eyes and
Harden your stride
Bby br <= me, unable to decode my shorthand. ideas?

There's no such thing
As Heaven sent
This is just a
Coincidence

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

My muse here was a woman with red hair who walked past. I think my attention was diverted before I could write anymore and by the time I got back to it, she was gone. Not entirely, that is, but just enough that I haven't added anything to this.

Physics

2009-10-02T07:34:00.001-07:00

Shades of colour
Fade
Through consciousness

Streams of light
Diffracting
Through glass

But I be Snell
Didn’t think
Of thought

When Newton’s
Prism
Light caught

(chorus)
They say today
Will be a gloomy day
If only as
The clouds are all gray

(But) Why go kill
A sunny disposition
For the sake of
A rainy day?

Shatter white
Light
Into pieces

Roy in the forest
G. Biv in
The desert

Confuse me
To no end
And the physicists smirk

So explain it to me…

(bridge?)
The banised
Colours
Fly and fly

‘Til they reach
The rods and cones
In your eyes

The upside-down
Colour-wheel
Shows

What life is
Like when
The world doesn’t glow

It makes me smile ☺

A Song, Untitled (Drunkeness)

2009-06-06T06:52:00.000-07:00

Let's have a drink
Make it pretentious
A glass of brandy
Or port wine

When the cheese
And crackers end
We'll go for something
More divine

Let's have a drink
A shot and chase it
Grab that beer and
Come and dance

Few more of the same
And you're far gone
Enough to tell with
Just a glance

This party's going off
I tell ya
All my friends
Were right

I will never have
More fun than
I'm having
Tonight

Let's have a drink
Love you forevermore
Will I remember this
Tomorrow?

Be sure to send a postcard
From the land
Without sorrow

Let's have a drink
Why's the world spinning?
And can we stop the
Floor moving?

I need to walk
My feet won't move
I need to talk
The words, confused
And now I'm drowning
Drowning
Drowning
Just get me on
The porcelain bus home
Before I pass-

Two of you, I know

2009-04-24T05:23:00.000-07:00

Do I know you?

Warm
Familiar surrounds
Remind me

Casting back...

Physical
Similarities fade
Different now

Grow with me?

Come
Close still
Whisper

Where to go?

Be still
Here and there
Fly

For Ash

2009-04-24T05:13:00.000-07:00

Fly shooting star
Fly

What is a true
false
Representation of thee?

How often do you fly,
How free
is free?

Move dancer
Move

Be the nimble
sturdy
Dancer, I know you to be

Passion, compassion, focus
You know
the key

Cold fire
Cold

What place does
depression
Hold in your being?

Chilled to the bone, thaw
Seek what
you're seeing

Warm fire
Warm

Blaze hot, inspire
passion
Near and afar

Smile, smile, smile
Fly far
shooting star.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

I really like her new tattoos =]

Barclay Blues (I)

2009-04-17T20:12:00.000-07:00

Love, hold me close
Fill my daily dose

With a bluesy tune
Dear, make me swoon

Be my today
And blow me away

Go with my flow
Ever so slow

Sweetheart be mine
Let the grape tell the vine

And you, I'll adore
Forever and evermore

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

An example of me writing for the sake of writing. My rhyming couplets never seem to flow...

Styx

2009-04-13T17:41:00.000-07:00

Curiously enough, the cemetery backs onto a river. The maps call it "Vicar", after the Vicar John Roberts. He led the first expedition out this way in the 1700s. The cemetery was built four years later. Three men died building the Church; the funeral was held in the only other completed building - the Tavern.

Years ago, before I left, I'd come down here on the weekends and sit by dad's grave, right next to the river. Usually I'd read. Fairytales and mythology mostly. When I was old enough to work, I saved and bought a portable radio. Dad used to take me to sporting matches back in the day; I sat by him later and listened to games being called on my radio.

I used to tell dad that the river should be called the Styx. He would have laughed at that. Kids would even build rafts, in the summer. My friends and I did it, one year when we were old enough to know better. We got to the middle of the river and I stood up and proclaimed that I was Charon, ferryman of the dead, and would be taking a cover charge from all who crossed.

There is a bridge, right on the edge of town. No cover charge, but it's one way, so you have to be watchful. Crossing the river takes you to the highway and eventually to the city. The other way takes you out bush. Well, further out bush. Last time I crossed the bridge out of town, I stopped on the other side. Got a picture, had one last look around, and took off. Had my grand adventure; living in the city, studying, drinking, working, partying. Made it through two degrees and a Masters.

I came back; every change I got to escape the big smoke, I took. Stayed with Mum and visited everyone. Guess it's fitting, this time I'm staying by myself and visiting Mum and Dad.

The town hasn't changed much. Aside from all the solar panels, everything's pretty much the way it was. The whole town still turns out to the cemetery for a funeral. We all still wear black. The closest living relatives still get the first handful of dirt; the first to say goodbye. That dirt's still hard to wash off.

And the river still flows.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Yay for stories! I had an urge to write something vague and quasi-rambling. Oddly enough, I had every intention of going into more detail, but it didn't seem to need it.

Playlist on Shuffle

2009-04-08T22:09:00.000-07:00

Bounce
Bounce
Bounce

You pretty tune
Swing me this way and that

Slink
Bassline
Slink

Be pretty cheeky
Tease me here and there

Hurry
Hurry
Hurry

Frantic pretty guitar
Shake me, wake me, take me

Buzz
Buzz
Buzz

Dirty pretty electric
Harmonise me a moonwalk

Bang
Bang
Bang

Strong pretty drum
Pressure me to birth a bassline

Chill
Chill
Chill

My pretty Superhero
Wonder me a world of Love

Dance
Dance
Dance

Pretty Emo kid
At least we have the Music

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

I was listening to music whilst thinking of what to write, and behold the result! Pretty much wrote a snapshot feel of a few songs.

Offspring: Why don't you get a job?
Dresden Dolls: Mandy goes to med school
System of a Down: Chop suey
FOB&JM: Beat it
Paramore: Born for this
Matchbox20: Real world
FOB: Dance dance (demo) <= yeah Helenabear, with the subliminal verse.

A day to See

2009-04-08T22:01:00.000-07:00

St Barnabas Church Sign:

"Jesus kicks the Hell out of Death."

:)

Pink Hummerzine:

Driven by buff man with platinum blonde hair, wearing a black, long-sleeved shirt and shiny, metallic gray pants.
Not sure if the Audi in front had anything to do with it, but they pulled up at roughly the same time.

Priest:

On the platform at Town Hall station. Wearing long black robes, complete with collar. Late 20s-30s? Short reddish/brownish hair and glasses. Backpack.

Nokia Ad:

Featuring Lady GaGa with a black lightning bolt on her right cheek.
(Helenabear, Lady GaGa opening for the Pussycat Dolls this May.)

Tara Close:

Street sign between Yennora and Fairfield stations, near an electrical substation. Not the first time I've seen it.
Conjures images of Buffy characters and fanfiction.

Mandy Goes to Med School:

Could you imagine doing a slow rhythm to this song?

Scooter:

Young guy smoking whilst on a (foot-powered) scooter. Wtf?

Manning, level 1

2009-04-06T18:46:00.000-07:00

Today I find myself at Manning. Nothing unusual about that; Manning houses my peeps. The class schedules of all of my other friends dictate that I have no one to hang out with at these times, so I find people. People from Sutekh.

Not that this is a great time or place to expound on the virtues of Sutekh (many though they are). That I save for another day, another time, poetically.

What I'm trying to say is that I'm bored. I brought my laptop to uni so I could check my emails without having to deal with uni computer labs and the likelihood that there will be no computers available for use. So I'm here, blogging and applying for jobs on seek, doing my darndest not to go read fanfiction, mainly because TwoBeard next to me will laugh himself to pieces if he finds out.

Helena, how do you find me all of these jobs??? The nine or so that you linked me to last week I had to abandon in the face of cataclysmic internet stuff-ups, and now I can't find any worth applying for. I have actually applied for a couple of desk jobs, which is better than I was doing before. Perhaps a look through Woolies again? We'll see...

Maybe I will get onto the fanfction when we move up to the bar area.

Ballroom

2009-03-28T17:33:00.000-07:00

March on.

Step,
A step,
And a step.

A group in pose
Awaiting
The first Note.

Keep time for me.

Beat,
A beat,
And a beat.

Lose me in
The Music
Take me there.

Opponents watching.

Look,
A look,
And a look.

Duplicity rife
Tell me more
Tell me Lies.

Move me

Feel,
A feeling,
And a feeling.

Swell music
Taper
Rest in stasis.

March off.

Competitive Dance

2009-03-28T17:31:00.001-07:00

Dances
And Dancers
Take to the floor.

Dancing
And Prancing
A few beats more.

Formal
Gaudy Attire
Quick change and change.

First
Second Place
Dancers engage.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

This I wrote at a competition a few weeks ago. I seem to enjoy writing about sport...

The Seat

2009-03-28T17:28:00.000-07:00

There's a seat on this train. Mid-way along the carriage it sits. Alone. The only unoccupied seat left, yet still alone. Why does no-one take this seat?

Might it be deformed, dismembered, disfigured in some way? A great long gash in it's side, innards flowing out. Deflated, dying, dust.

Might there be a foreign body perched atop it? A piece of trash, yesterday's news, a discarded piece of nothing. Devastating, isolating, intimidating.

Might it host an unmovable guest? A drink, a meal, or remnants thereof. Disgusting, disturbing, depraved.

Sit tight little seat. Have hope. Perchance next station, you'll be lonely not?

Musings@Manning (I)

2009-03-28T17:25:00.000-07:00

Friend,
Be my friend.

Fiend,
To the end.

Soft,
Speak so now.

Friend,
Ask me how.

You,
One to hold.

Me,
I be bold.

For friend,
Be my friend.

From now,
To the end.

An Extract from my Pretty Recycled Paper Notebook

2009-02-13T18:56:00.000-08:00

14th Feb 2008
10:45am

Dearest Jonas,

I feel almost completely at peace. 2008 was a better year than I could have hoped for. The one downside was that too many of the oldest generation left us.

Now, the first of the next generation has gone.

Yesterday we buried Francis Johnson. He was a cousin by marriage and a jovial addition to the DiCello family. Everyone knew him, or at least knew of him.

He died of a heart attack last week, four hours after a stress test told him his heart was doing fine, better than ever even.

I didn't really know him. Mum said it would be really nice if I went to his funeral and I agreed. So yesterday found me at a Forest Lawn Cemetery Chapel, listening to people speak about him. The effect he had on the family was too great for words. I cried, simply because a man who brought great joy to so many people has been lost. His eldest niece read a poem she'd written (there wasn't much age difference between the two). I cried hardest then.

One of his friends said, "Logically, we are born to die."

Logically, we are born to live. We live to die. Are we born to die?

Existentially, yes, I suppose that is true.

Realistically?

Francis has shown that life isn't measured by death. The memories of him are memories of life.

Logically, we are born to live.

Happy Valentine's Jonas.

All my love,
Saricella

11am

Dive

2009-02-11T03:05:00.000-08:00

To Helena,

An insight into my mindset at some point during yr12. I hope you find it interesting :)

Much love,
Saricella

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

In an ocean of possibility,
Thirty, Forty, Fifty
Swim relentless
Against the tide
or with it
Flailing drown
or Stroke Perfection.

And in this ocean
Shallow clear
Deep potential,
I float.

Others dive into the deep,
The highest honour awaits them there.

Whilst I am stuck
Paralysis my house guest,
Never diving deeply,
My puppet strings pulling me to the surface
Then forcing me under.

And as I drown I do not sink,
Yet float,
Remaining forever my shallow self.

The North Tower (a Wzrd Rock song)

2009-02-11T02:56:00.001-08:00

Tall and
Dark and
Lean
You stand

The scene
Of Dark
Horrible
Acts

You hold
A secret
In your
Depths

The likes
Of which
No one
Has met

(Chorus)
Tower over us
Forevermore
Let no one let you go
Or let you fall
Tower over us
Our North-most
Sentinel

I still remember your
Dark dark halls
Spiral staircases aplenty
Concave walls

Divination: Tea leaves
Orbs and stifling heat
How many true Seers
Did you meet?

The stairs go higher
Higher and higher
The stairs go higher
Higher and higher
(blah, etc)
Til I stand and watch
The sunrise from
Your turrets

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Yeah, so delving into Wizard Rock here. I wrote this on Boxing Day last year, before the Monster Trucks started :)

Chemistry (II)

2008-12-10T02:23:00.000-08:00

[Co(NH3)6]Cl3

[Co(NH3)6]3+

NH3 => neutral

Therefore Co has 3+ charge.

[Co(NH3)5Cl]Cl2

[Co(NH3)5Cl]2+

Cl => 1-

Therefore Co has 3+ charge.

Shift and then
Focus your sight
Take a seat
Pull out a book

To take notes
Is the key to
It is not
So horrible

You might just
Learn something
If you can
Just pay attention

Cobalt
Ammonia
Chlorine

It gives you

A metal
A ligand
An ion

And if you get it
Congratulations
You might forget it
From now 'til then

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

So, blogger doesn't let me super- or subscript anything, which is why all the numbers don't make sense :P

A Song (Unfinished and Untitled)

2008-12-10T02:14:00.000-08:00

Tick Tock
Goes the clock
Tick Tock
Once again
Tick Tock
That's six seconds
So come meet your end

Janet's down the front
Pays attention all day
If she passes this class
Then she won't have to stay

She'll be able to
Escape her horrible life
Not stay meek and make
An obedient wife

Let's all cheer for her
And her feeble attempts
Pretend that she won't
Go to hell in a hand basket

Marco is listening
To screams at the back
At the end of the term
He will know but jack

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

I have a vague idea where it's going :)

As yet untitled (a song)

2008-11-14T16:53:00.000-08:00

Tristan dreams
Of cricket teams
In black and white
All day and night

Nothing can distract him
From his blue-gray haze
Nothing can deter him
From his daily daze

Because the world
Has said goodbye
Barely noticing
That he's alive

Jane walks through the gate
Heading home one day
She listens to the cars
Driving far away

Nothing can distract her
From her work day haze
Or send her spinning into
A lovesick daze

Her solitary supper's
Waiting
No time for fast food
Or dating. No...

Peter walked away
From his bride today
The groom's men were all shaking
What a thing to say

Will he find a good distraction
In his drunken haze?
Will he wake up in the morning
From a lustful daze?

He did it out
Of love
One emotion's not
Enough. No...

Tristan dreams
Of cricket teams
While Jane walks on
To the cars beyond

Peter he is walking
It doesn't stop him loving
But no one sees their hell
Won't believe that all's not well

The world
Has said goodbye
Not noticing
Who's alive

Wealth

2008-10-26T22:58:00.000-07:00

If I were a rich girl
There'd be more questions
For you to ask me

How do you do?
What did you do?
Mind, body or soul?

A rich mind yields ideas
Ridiculed and persecuted
The sin is optimism

To be rich is not a crime
Yet persecution abounds
The sin is gluttony

Richness of spirit is applauded
And persecuted still
The sin is faith

If I were a mean girl
There'd be more
To say to you

Why are you?
What terror is this?
Sick, twisted or scarred?

Existence is key
To a life of pain
The disease of humanity

Psychosis is free
For the mean girls and boys
The screams of humanity

Physical wounds fade
Before sadism ends
The curse of humanity

If I were a straight girl
There'd be more or less
To say or ask

Do you love me?
Do I love you?
Do we love?

Insecurities run rampant
Just ask
The sin is love

Fear and fever and passion
Just do it
The sin is lust

In the end, what is left?
Mean it
The sin is life

Poesia alla Moda

2008-10-26T22:53:00.000-07:00

Moda a moda
La nostra casa di lusso
E` aperto per tutti
Vestitivi in oro

Moda con la moda
Torni domani
C'e` un vestito d'argento
Che chiama il tuo nome

Moda per la moda
Una festa a casa nostra
Tutti i vestiti colorati
Fanno luce bianca

Moda della moda
La nostra casa di lusso
E` chiuso sta sera
Vestitivi a casa

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Loose English translation:

Fashion to fashion
Our house of glamour
Is open for all
Dress in gold

Fashion with fashion
Return tomorrow
There's a silver dress
That calls your name

Fashion for fashion
A party at our house
All the colourful dresses
Make white light

Fashion from fashion
Our house of glamour
Is closed this evening
Dress at home

In Memoria

2008-08-11T02:25:00.000-07:00

In memory of my grandfather Michele, his brother Giovanni and all those who have passed on. May they rest in peace, until we join them beyond. We love you.

Verse I
We have gathered
Here together
In mourning
Loss, pain and suffering

But we're celebrating
The lives you lived
The happy families
You grew us into

Pre-Chorus
Surrounded
By love we'll
Live in memory
Of you

Our hearts always
Filled with
The memory
Of you

Chorus
So play your Heavenly card game
Drink your wine and
Watch life roll by
You're with us now
You're in our hearts
You are named and
You'll never fade away

Verse II
Vi amiamo
Padre, fratello
Madre, sorella
Nella nostra gioia

Vi celebriamo
Con le nostre lacrime
Vi ringraziamo
Con I nostri sorrisi

Pre-Chorus
C'e` sempre un posto
Nelle nostre vite
Per la memoria
Di voi

C'e` sempre la vita
Che noi viviamo
In memoria
Di voi

Chorus
Giocate a carte in Paradiso
Bevete il tuo vino e
Guardate la vita
Siete con noi
Nei nostri cuori
Vi chiamiamo e
Sparite mai

Bridge
Stay in our hearts
Forevermore
State sempre con noi

Until we meet
You again
State sempre con noi

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

A translation of the Italian:

Verse II
We love you
Father, brother
Mother, sister
In our joy

We celebrate you
With our tears
We thank you
With our smiles

Pre-Chorus
There is always a place
In our lives
For the memory
Of you

There is always the life
That we live
In memory
Of you

The Chorus is a direct translation of the English

Bridge
Stay in our hearts
Forevermore
Stay with us always

Until we meet
You again
Stay with us always

Una Lettera

2008-07-06T03:30:00.000-07:00

Cara amica,

Non so il tuo nome, pero` forse mi ricordi. Ho parlato con te alla stazione.

Ti ho chiesto se visitavi famiglia e hai risposto si. Viene d'Italia, vicino a Venezia. Un viaggio di trenta ore, del'altro lato del mondo. Ho parlato della mia famiglia, pero` poco. Noi siamo del Sud, tu del Nord. L'altro lato del mondo.

Vorrei parlare in italiano e forse dovevo fare cosi. La conversazione fosse stata piu`...

Un minuto di piu` e ho guardato quando sei partita. Forse ti trovero` un giorno? Piuttosto non ti vedro`.

In ogni caso, non scordo mai i tuoi occhi verdi, i tuoi capelli ricci e la tua voce del Nord.

Baci, amica mia,

Sara
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

The story:

I met an Italian family at the train station today, while I was waiting for a bus (I know, but you can catch buses there). The man asked for help finding the right bus. I was talking to the young girl sitting next to me and she mentioned they were from Italy, near Venice. As I watched them walk away, I was inspired.

English Translation:

Dear friend,

I don't know your name, but maybe you remember me. I spoke with you at the station.

I asked if you were visiting family and you answered yes. You come from Italy, near Venice. A journey of thirty hours, from the other side of the world. I spoke of my family, though a little. We're from the South, you from the North. The other side of the world.

I wanted to speak in italian with you and maybe I should have. The conversation would have been more...

A minute more and I watched as you left. Maybe I'll find you one day? More likely I'll never see you.

Either way, I'll never forget your green eyes, curly hair and voice of the North.

With love, my friend,

Sara

The Soccer Match

2008-06-30T00:17:00.000-07:00

A field in uniform
Two rows of ten
And two colourful shirts

Casual Commanders
And a whistleblower,
The father we hope is fair

The cliche` says a battle
Advance, retreat, spar
And pray for victory

The cavalry draws near
A trampling of hooves heard
On this grassy knoll

Screaming and screaching
The viewing public is indistinguishable
From the cockatoos overhead

Still the play continues.
A brief rest was not enough
To still pounding hearts

A fast pace set
And stumbled over
Brief ecstasy felt in the air

History is written by victors
Yet these records tell no tale
Save a number and a name

Both camps camped
Winners and losers alike in eloquence
Celebrating a game: The Game

Blackout

2008-06-16T02:42:00.000-07:00

We prepare for it
A quite hope rises
Will it come?
Torches at the ready
Matches ready to be lit
The anticipation builds
The crash that exhilirates a nation's fear
Suddenly, the darkness is here

Not yet titled, but we're getting there :)

2008-06-16T02:20:00.000-07:00

The first one is a memory
A shock to the system
In a tasty blast of fire
The night begins

The second goes down easier
As do the next couple
By then the world is happy
And you've lost count

This position is confusing
Who enjoys being here?
In a loss of equilibrium
And shaking from the cold

Do you think the drunken sailor
Remembers the first girl
In the last port?
Or this one?

The sickness is increasing
The euphoria deceasing
The more it comes
The less I want

See the boat swaying
But the sailor's not praying
He is out a-laying
The girls one by one

Through the haze I reach you
Foolishly believing
You'll love the fool
The drink brings out

Come a little closer sailor
I've something to whisper to you
Too bad the ambience is loud
I'll have to shout it anyhow

Come a little closer
I've something you need to hold
It's hiding underneath us
Do you get the feeling?

Come even closer
I've something for you to taste
When love has left the room
And sex is all that's left

Chemistry

2008-06-04T21:16:00.000-07:00

IS

a description of verse
a suggestion of quality
a notation of quantity

to theorise and define
brief organic nomenclature
or analytical calculation

what IS gives way
to what CAN BE

the unknown found
a structure discovered
ideas thought

pen put to paper
lines, shapes and colours
smile as we read

CAN BE

Unrequited Love Should Be A Crime (a song)

2008-04-30T02:44:00.000-07:00

Friend I cannot tell you
How I feel
(How I feel)

Friend I cannot tell you
What is real
(If this is real)

Friend I cannot let you
Into here
(Into my heart)

Friend I love you
Far too much
(Far too much)

(Chorus)
Hold me close tonight
As I dissociate myself from you
Show me all your love
As I engulf you in mine

Friend tell me you love me
Whisper it
(Whisper to me)

Friend it will never stop
Decimating my soul
(I'm dying)

(Chorus)

I can lie
Here tonight
And miss you
All over again

Forget me not
Please

There's no way
We could be
Friend
I'll let you go

Promise not to miss me
Please

(Chorus)

Friend remember I love you
Far too much...

Tomorrow (a song)

2008-04-29T03:27:00.000-07:00

Today it rained
It rained and it poured
I sat by the window
And heard the wind roar

The thunder and lightning
It kept me inside
But tomorrow...

Today it rained
As I sat on my rock
I was reading my book
And the cold was a shock

The thunder and lightning
It sent me inside
But tomorrow...

Today it is raining
It's raining it's pouring
I lie on the ground
And the wind, it is roaring

I feel so in tune
With the thunder
And lightning

And even my clay prison
Is not so
Frightening

I want to stay
Cleanse my sins
Away

Can I lie here for now?
Can the world understand
My need to be here?

Raise me back to life
And I'll show you
I'll show you

If the world were to
Fall
At least let it rain

Tomorrow it rained
And I sat and
Thought...

Red Lipstick (a song)

2008-04-24T05:50:00.000-07:00

There's a stain on my shirt
In a blood red hue
It's a single drop
And belongs to you

There's a stain on my lips
In the same bright red
But the taste is mingled
With the tears you shed

(Prechorus)
Meet me in
The back room
As always
We'll paint that
Blood read lipstick
On ours

(Chorus)
Let me taste you once again
Sustain me for another day
And show me it's real
My love

There's a pain in my chest
Where my heart used to be
It's a beating request
For my soul to be free

Trapped as I am
I find solace in you
But I would drink you dry
'Til your lips turn blue

(Structure to be determined)

Gynaecologist (a song)

2008-04-24T05:08:00.000-07:00

Ronnie had a point,
When he said he was a slave.
I touched
You touched
Me
Love visited

Today we've no chance to behave
I loved
You loved
Me
Just one thing, could you

(Chorus)
Make me
Come along to the party
Make me
Sing along with the band
Make me
Drink along with the drunkards
Make me
Kiss a long time

Before loving you

I'd say there's something
To be said
For saying words
Inside my head

And if we were alone tonight
You know I'd scream it out instead

Think it louder and louder
Then let me know that
You crave
I crave
Your skin

So touch
I'll touch
You
Make me beg
And I'll

(Chorus)
Make you
Come along to the party
Make you
Sing along with the band
Make you
Drink along with the drunkards
Make you
Kiss a long time

Before loving me

Forgive me if I thought that
You look better
With your shirt off

You know how it is
So late at night
When you're playing gin
Then awake to light and think

This isn't my bed...

It was now i remembered
Your occupation
The great irony is
You really know what you're doing

So beg
I beg
You beg
(etc)
One last time, just

(Chorus)
Make me
Come along to the party
Make me
Sing along with the band
Make me
Drink along with the drunkard
Make me
Kiss
Kiss
Kiss
Kiss

You

Mary Jane - A Song

2008-04-16T17:50:00.000-07:00

Mary Jane sits on the wall
Hidden for all to see

Mary Jane, Queen of fun
The reason for her to be

The query is passed
The world of mouth spread

Mary Jane's coming to visit

A party in the living room

Where no expense is spared

A party and the guest of honour

Is still getting prepared

She is now ready

How pretty she is

As we take her down from the wall

Mary Jane invites us out

To sit in the garden

Mary Jane invites us to dance

Without the fire warden

The pyrotechnics start

As it burns and she burns

Mary Jane is passed around

The party's in the garden

Now everyone's invited

The part waits in the garden

And the feast bringer is knighted

Mary Jane laughs and twirls

Feeding our hunger

Craving fools, we continue

Mary Jane's in the air

Whispering nothing so sweetly

Mary Jane makes us laugh

And fills us so completely

As the comfort increases

And smiles prevail

I now dance with her

Crashing and burning, overdone it's true

Is not apt for her

Crashing and burning and turning and churning

Close enough truth to deter

Now that I have tasted her

Mary Jane I must say

It's the last I'll ever dance with you.

Lingua

2008-03-05T23:57:00.000-08:00

Forma a forma
E faccio un'errore
Parlo troppo piano
E tu non ascolti

C'e` una lingua antica
Che lo sappiamo noi
Parliamolo sempre
A nessuno

Lingua a lingua
Ancora faccio l'errore
Vado troppo veloce
E ancora non mi ascolti

Ma senti quello che dico?
Sono qui
Sono io
E` vero

Vedi quello che fai?
Ignorante
Ascoltami
Parliamo di qualcosa

---------------------------

Traduzione:

Form to form
And i make a mistake
I'm speaking too slow
And you're not listening

There's an ancient language
That you and I know
We speak it all the time
To no one

Mouth to mouth (<= actually more complicated, double meaning to do with kissing)
Still I make mistakes
I'm going to fast
And you're still not listening

Can you hear what i'm saying?
I'm here
I'm me
It's true

Can you see what you're doing?
Ignorant fool
Listen to me
Let's talk about something

Lecture

2008-03-05T23:46:00.000-08:00

Gaussian surfaces
Are assigned areas of charge
Aiding in the plodding of data

A collection of students
Is a rabble of grazing youths
Plodding to and from class

Arrange students in a hall (or theatre)
Gaussian surfaces apparent
Take the data and plod it

A biologist could make sens of it
Predict some such trend
Or other

A mathematician could make sense of it
Manipulate and plod again
Making his or her own trends

But a student?
Neither notices nor cares
And just goes and gets some lunch

You

2008-03-04T01:23:00.000-08:00

You
And no other

Mother
Father
And none

Homestead on a rocky hill
Brother devil on a rocking horse
And you

Sit
Me
Down
In the firing line

Hope
To
Live
And live and die

And see you

Friend in the mirror
Friend out of sight
Friend but I need you
Befriend me tonight

I’ll wait for colour
Dream in black and white
I’ll wait in fear
In this cold cross-sight

Just for you

Beaded
And jaded
By what we do

Shredded
And deaded
By something new (that’s not a word)

Fall into nothing
Fall it with me
Falling again
I’m falling again

Without you

A Tower

2008-02-18T14:48:00.000-08:00

A tower
Metres and metres high
To people at the top
We are but ants beneath the sky

See them
Ants upon the floor?
See their hustle here
Bustle there, want for something more?

Today
I was one of those ants
A small existence ‘twas
One at which I looked askance at

Up here
I see it all so clear
I’ll fly beneath the sky above
And bring it ever near’r

But to fly
From this tower high
Will stop only me
Not the ants beneath the sky

Parchment

2008-02-02T22:59:00.000-08:00

May this parchment serve you well
As it lives
Throughout time

May it keep a healthy chronicle
Of reason
And of rhyme

While you journey yonder
Over seas and
Over mountains

May you remember always
A parchment’s fear
Of fountains

It Bites

2008-01-21T21:06:00.000-08:00

Clenching
Fretting
A need overwhelms

Twist
Turn
Mad Captain at helm

I see you
I see you
You who would torment

A Sneak
and a Snake
And your will is bent

But Thrashing
and Thrashing
The chains, they do burn

How vile
the Bile
When a stomach does turn

Where are the fucking prawn crackers???

2007-12-18T01:42:00.000-08:00

Yes, i just finished the prawn crackers :( and the last one tried to escape :o ! Didn't get very far, it went up my sleeve :S

On a completely unrelated note (depending on how you look at it) I got home last night and discovered a bruise on my knee. No, i was not attacked by prawns. Why is it terribly important then, you ask? Well, i'd been to a concert, and to be injured at a concert is an honour i've never before received. Now i have :] So, who's happy? :D me

Yes, Amanda Palmer is effing awesome, just to clarify.

*listens to Kaledrina*

Enough of my semi-coherent ramblings! I'll just leave you with another song, big band, or quite possibly motown(ish). It doesn't feel finished, but we'll see how it goes.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Remember when
You were Oh
So much younger and

Life, as the cliche` goes,
Was Oh
So much simpler and

You found adventure in
The smallest things
Like, a rainbow for a slide

Oh, the joy it'd bring
In the bath to see
A bubble angel floating by.

How I wish that thing
Could stay the same
Forever (and a day)

We would have joy
And no more bitterness
No cynicism for today.

Remember when a
Cardboard box was the biggest
Castle on the block

How that flimsy structure would
Protect you from the
Horrors just outside.

Well, I can tell ya,
I have lived in a
Shoe box/cell/Apartment

It ain't so glamorous
As when we were
Pretending

And how I wish these walls
Would keep all of those
Dragons at bay.

These walls aren't fireproof
And sadly that's
How they'll stay.

There ain't no quick reprieve
It's plain to see
This brave new world won't stay.

Oh and golly gee, thank goodness
I'd not like that
To be

So thank you for those cardboard houses
Thank you for those long whole hours
Thank you for letting me live free.

This doesn't have a beginning

2007-12-05T02:00:00.000-08:00

...
(You're [plural])
Invading all my happy days
With false promises
(piano)

There's a fire breathing
Oh so coldly
In the depths
Of my conscious self

A fire rivaling
The caustic burn
Of your words on my
Throat

It doesn't even help
To bite them back
Swallow the
Vitriol

That bile tastes
So foul
I feel my stomach
Lining breaking

Words assaulting from in front and
Words assaulting from behind
Compound my stomach ache
As i fight it one more time

The temptation to
Sink lower
Overpowers on occasion
But thank Heaven you don't see that

No, you only see
The little girl
The one you joked
The one you bullied

I HAVE GROWN
But she's still there
Hiding on the
Outside

My protective shield
The old clam shell
But you eat shellfish
Don't you?

For years and years
My shell grew larger
Stronger
Til the junction was unclear

Who was I?
And who was she?
The words still stung
So wt?

Now the brave ol' rock
Of yesteryear's
Been washed away
Eroded down to sand

I've cast away my
Shield
And fight with armour
Dusty from disuse

It's braver to stand
Up and be
Just be, that's right
I'll just be me

So what if you can
See my heart?
My true intentions,
Here at last!

The fire's not so cold today
It's not so hard to
Fight that
Caustic burn

I'd rather not spit in
Your face
Be warned I'll strip you down
Shun you embrace

Your cold dead fingers
On my neck
They keep me breathing
Double Deck

I'll keep on playing
Silly games
With cards
It's not so hard

Just let the water flow around
Or wash me clean
From all those times
I drowned

I don't need saving
Anymore
My friends and I
We saved ourselves

We walk away from
All your lies
And all your cheats and all
Your cries

Save yourselves
It's not our job
We've seen the light
You see the fog

So keep on staring
Keep on staring
As we walk away form
You

This is the last time
That your arrows
Will find their
Way on through...

The Dealer

2007-11-15T22:11:00.000-08:00

Deal me in
Our trek begins
Battle, Struggle to the finish

Gather, Meet
In all our armour
Deciding our style
Fine-tuning parameters

Play it straight
5 studs or 7
Or variate
With a Queen or 2

"First to 5, or 7 wins
Two pair don't count..."
Just Deal Me In!
Shuffle...

Cuts...
Cut the deck
(or for some players,
a Good Deal More)
Dealer, house, and bank galore

First hand is called
The Second drawn
Win or lose outright
The Fourth brought

The Brawl
(Brawling)

Our Trek was not ended
Yet all was in ruins
One man lay untouched
High horse reigned in

With unblemished armour
The Dealer sat smirking
I spat blood and glared,
Eyes and lips throbbing

I tossed down my Aces,
Announced a Full House
Back straight and Stormy muttered
"Deal Me Out..."

Mutterings

2007-11-14T22:22:00.000-08:00

These two may or may not be connected, i'm not sure...
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

Let me fly
In my fancy silver bathtub
Let the wind
Ruffle feathers on its wings
As i recline
Look at the sky
And you will see me waving
Goodbye

I want the world
I want the world
No one will listen
To me (or you)
There is the Mountain
Pity Muhammed has no climbing gear

Strap on your pack (and go)
Once you get to the top
Will you still plead our case?
Will it still be your cause?
Or were you tempted enough
To enjoy their lifestyle?

A Block (written a while ago)

2007-10-30T20:01:00.000-07:00

It cannot be explained
That which is occuring

No time to linger long
We are not moving

Sentences verbose
Nouns are not enough

Some adjective is needed
My dictionary won't open

Expression
Obsession

Tell me what it is
Without words

Words i want
You know what i need

A Dream of Death

2007-10-27T00:39:00.000-07:00

Background:

Murder
Murder
Headlines cry

Drowning
Drowning
Green water and die

Falling
Falling
After a fashion

Trapped
Trapped
In weeds of passion

Eyes
Eyes
Psychosis is thine

Mine
Mine
That murder is mine

Present Day:

Wedding bells chime and a Bridal March plays
A Priest, a Priest
Calls for happy days

At the end of the aisle stand a couple of lovers
A fraud, a fraud
Cry all the others

She will not drown, not like those before
Blood, blood
Will come to her door

Uprising ensues when the fraud is revealed
He runs, he runs
His mind still not healed

She was saved, she was, on this very date
For him, for him
Another victim waits

Hey there Delilah

2007-10-20T03:19:00.001-07:00

Light hit her, blinding her eyes, less than a second before the barrage of sounds did the same to her ears. Delilah stood in shock at the number of people crowded into the foyer, laughing and talking loudly. They, in turn stared inquisitively (but politely) at her, unsure who the girl standing upon the doorstep was.

Regaining her senses, she stuttered, "H-hi. I'm Delilah. Gina's friend."

In the distance, she heard a garbled question. A woman near the front of the crowd shouted a response, "It's Delilah, Regina!"

A squeal greeted the shout, followed by a good deal of movement from the crowd - someone was trying to get to the front. After a few seconds a person flew out the door, folding Delilah into a bear hug.

"Reg!" came the strangled gasp from Delilah.

"Yeah let her breathe Gina!" the crowd chorused, as both girls collapsed into giggles.

Most of the evening was a blur for Delilah. After being ushered inside she was immediately absorbed into the crowd. Regina made a point of introducing Delilah to everyone, and while Delilah was sure to forget most names, she felt she was part of the family.

“So Delilah, what’re you studying?” asked one cousin, or aunt, she wasn’t sure, “Gina said something about journalism, but you know how confusing she is.”

“Hahaha, yes I know I can never get a straight answer out of her,” came the giggled reply, “I’m doing a double degree, Science/Arts.”

“Do you have to do maths?” piped up a smaller cousin.

“Yes, sadly I do.”

“Eww! Maths sucks!!!” chimed several cousins.

The laughter never stopped, Delilah noticed. Even if a sombre subject was discussed, another group were laughing, hysterically at that. The family drank up each other’s presence, enjoying every moment they had together. Petty arguments were quickly diffused, the culprits embracing for the rest of the evening.

Soon enough it was announced to the household that the cake would be cut.

“Five minutes okay?” came the warning.

Fifteen minutes later the dinner table was surrounded and the candles were being lit. Delilah watched from behind the crowd as Regina was thrust into the seat at the head of the table. As the last candle was lit, Regina looked around.

“Where’s Delilah?”

Heads turned this way and that. Once Delilah was located, a spotlight could not have been brighter.

“Come ON Delilah!” Regina gestured. Shyly, Delilah made her way over to Regina’s side.

“Take a picture!” someone called. A chorus of assent rose from the crowd, as cameras were passed to the cousins in the foreground. Delilah awkwardly moved closer, before Regina threw her arms around her. Chuckling at her friend’s bluntness, Delilah relaxed into Regina’s arms. Lights flashed around them as they laughed and pulled faces.

Keeping one arm around her friend, Regina picked up the cake knife, staring cheekily around the room.

“Get on with it Gina!” they all knew she was playing, but enjoyed playing along too much, “Just cut the cake already!”

Ginning, Regina made a neat cut into the soft cake, barely disturbing the icing.

Impressed, one cousin remarked, “That’s why she’s going to be such a good surgeon.”

Laughing appreciatively, the crowd continued with their games, “Come on now Gina, you touched the bottom, you have to kiss the nearest boy!”

“What if I don’t want to kiss the nearest boy?” came the half-serious reply.

“Too bad!” the crowd shouted back.

Regina sighed, stating somewhat enigmatically, “Fine, I’ll go for the next best thing.”

Pulling Delilah closer, Regina kissed her; softly at first, then with more flair. The game dictated she put on a show. Staring into each other’s eyes a few seconds later, they couldn’t help smiling shyly. Expecting dead silence, they were surprised at the outbreak of giggles, and a few appreciative whistles. More than a little embarrassed at their daring, Regina and Delilah joined in the laughter.

“Finally!” cried Regina’s sister, “I was so afraid you were going to stay single forever and live as a hermit on some mountain!” A fresh wave of laughter rolled over the crowd. Regina and Delilah smiled and hugged once more.

_____________

Why is it that i write something and hate it once i read over it? Answer me that...

The Headline Read: Death by Fantasy

2007-10-18T02:01:00.000-07:00

Time is irrelevant when in mourning, so feel free to fuck with it. I think someone said that to me one day, years ago. Or I made it up to keep myself happy. Either way, it’s true. I know, because just last week I was fucking with time.

I don’t really remember when I first met her. Seventh grade camp somewhere in the bush, it might have involved an axe and some chocolate. I don’t know, I spent that camp knocked out from a fallen tree branch. All I got to do was archery. Anyway, the week after, at school, she was suddenly my friend.

We had a few things in common, a love of books and classic rock, contempt for ‘dance’ music (that you can only samba to) and the desire to learn how to properly arrange orchards. Mostly we’d predict people’s actions before they carried them out. Though evenly matched, our skill greatly surpassed everyone else’s.

Aside from that, we were two very different people. Putting aside (and occasionally embracing) these differences, our friendship grew. Growing bored with our analysis of playground faces, we extended our talents to the wider community, and, eventually, to literature. Having read most of the classics, and analysed characters and plot, we quickly became stuck. What were we to do, now that we had exhausted our source of fun? It was a conundrum that kept us in a table tennis and pool playing rut for weeks.

The answer came suddenly one day. As most answers do, it arrived on the doorstep at an awkward moment. I could tell you that we were building a small fort in her bedroom but you’d know that wasn’t true. Over dinner than night it was agreed; we would take a novel each and re-write it based on a single change in the main character’s persona.

She chose for me the usual crime-fiction she knew I detested. As parameters: I was not to turn it into a fantasy or romance and feathers were to be involved somehow. For her I chose a fantasy, of course, and told her not to make it crime or historical, and to involve a boa constrictor.

Tragedy struck a week later, on our way home from a picnic. Engrossed as she was in the novel (reading it for the fifth time) she lost all senses and got into a fight with a train. She lost. The irony was not lost on me: the train carriage was called ‘Fantasy’.

Una poesia in un ristorante

2007-10-14T01:13:00.000-07:00

Fra mille anni
Tratta forse
Che mangiamo qual'cosa differente

Oggi, pero`,
Sto contenta
Di mangiare cosi`

_____

This can be seen as singing the praises of the restaurant, which i was, it was great. Also, this reads as an ad...

Oh my Beautiful One

2007-10-09T00:14:00.000-07:00

I love you to the moon and back
But my spaceship's out of fuel

I would cut the first rose for you
Though i would drown in the garden

Slip beneath the ice
To see my beloved

Cut her a rose
As thorns cut her too

The moon looks black
From this, my vantage

On the negative of a photo
With poison on my lips

While i may be immortal
None know such joys as these

The fire, the lonely suffering
'Tis why i seek to have you closer

I would be with thee
On the black moon of ours

Sharing our poison
Caressing black rose thorns

Yet all the while drowning
Slowly, beneath the ice

Ludwig (unfinished)

2007-10-04T18:08:00.000-07:00

Ludwig and Friend were playing a game
“I’ll guess your music, you guess my name”

The challenge was met and, of course, Ludwig won
“My music’s unheard of, your name is just one”

On they both lived, Ludwig and Friend
His name said to none, save a whisper at end

“Come closer, dear Friend,” he called in his way
“Let me whisper your name and bid thee good day”

And so it was that they parted from then
Never to meet, nor to speak again

Another Poem From Mathematics

2007-10-04T04:21:00.000-07:00

Olfactory Attraction
Deems i prefer one paper
Or one book
Over another

The young and fresh
Adventuresome
Or old, seasoned and loved
You are mine

Be you brash
Reckless in your nature
Or bored and apathetic
True love shall not come from me

Oh to sit with a sturdy tome
Recline and be comfortable
Lightly touch your pages
Lovingly caress your spine

I love you completely
Though you cause me no end of bother
And 'til reality seeks a companion
Fantasy shall be my lover

Parachutes

2007-10-04T04:01:00.000-07:00

For Tuls

My little parachute
See it fly
See it soar

You float, you float
So prettily
And float right out the door

Have many little
Adventures
And big adventures too

Just come back
Little parachute
Adventure with me too

Remember Fold? It's back :)

2007-10-01T04:01:00.000-07:00

Fold
Fold again and again
Will you ever stand?
Un-crease the fold?

Allow life
So walk along
Smell a rose
Just be

Is this the last act in the play?
How will you end?
Break the shackles of existence?
Will you be free after that?

So please fold again and again
Stand up and shout!
Un-crease that fold
In your cape

Allow us to be
Walk along with me
Smell that rose
Let it be

Face the Last Act
End the Play
Free you prisoners
Just don't save the day

No just Fold

Ode to Staedtler

2007-09-17T23:32:00.000-07:00

I. Chicken
II. Vampire Smile
III. Pens!!!
IV. Calligraphy
V. and VI. The Innuendo is Purely for your Benefit
VII. Tombstone

My friend bounced up and told me
"I have a German pen!"
I knew what she was like and thought
"Oh, what a silly hen!"

Too quick was I to throw disdain
And laugh and chortle too
Her passion overtook her as
She said "I wish you knew!"

So Monday through to Friday's eve
She praised her pen with glee
Bought another and another
And then bought one for me

Through expounding on the virtues
The colours pink and blue
Green and orange; how they wrote
Oh! Now I love them too!

I took the pen she gave me (pink!)
It was my very own
And wrote and wrote and wrote with it
'Til all the ink was blown

Now it lays beside me, dying
Spread-eagled on the floor
Observing its spent carcass
I think "I want one more"

Farewell my blue-inked German pen!
Oh what a time we've had
Our adventures are all chronicled
In my lecture pad

To Question: Part IV - An Inspection of Desire

2007-09-17T22:56:00.000-07:00

Two roses stood together
Entwined stem to stem
I stood there, gazing in envy
Longing for one to be mine

Questions formed themselves
In the deep dark currents of thought
Did i want the rose?
Or just a flower, to call my own?

A private Hell burned inside me
At the sight of rose with rose
Or the thought of flower and flower
And my standing alone forever

Yet in my time with a rose
I felt not the joy of Heaven
Only a quiet Purgatory
At clandestine moments

Desirous to burn all flora
For forsaking that which i give
Held back by the Hope of Heaven
I quell torrential flames

Inevitably I sit thinking
A torrential downpour of thoughts
Better it be the rain to comfort me
Wait and Hope for a flower of my own

Giddiness

2007-09-13T00:12:00.000-07:00

Oh to be happy!
What a wonderful state

We all know it
We've all known it

Life has an undercurrent of misery
Why must it be so?

Yet this is not a lament
Far removed

Ode of Joy
A day of Joy

It is a day to celebrate
And celebrate we shall!

This day of days
Why not all days?

All days are worthy
So let them be worthy

Let us be giddy with merriment!
And never stop!

To Question: Part III - Integrity

2007-09-11T18:29:00.000-07:00

Is it wrong to question integrity?

A whisper
A whisper
That everyone hears
Yet no one knows of

That which would have you looking up at the sky
And realising it is the world
Which is looking down at you
Down upon you

Is it wrong to question motives?

The scene of the crime is rife with clues
A finger print there
Puddle of blood
Of course, the body

Suspect the list
And all those on it
No one is above suspicion
Make sure you arrest the right person, though

Is it wrong to hate actions?

A fist is only meant
In the heat of the moment
As with a hug
Or a kiss

Inaction is as worse
Sedentary
Shirking
Take responsibility

Is it wrong to hate words?

An empty love is full of words
Spoken and unspoken
Filled with contempt
And other nasty emotions

Words of any sort
Really mean nothing
Superflous and unnecessary
When you have actions

Is it wrong to be so hypocritical?

I will say one thing
And mean another
If only to appease you
Of what i truly feel

I mean all i say
Though not allways followed
My actions should speak louder
Then again, I don't expect them to be heard

Is it wrong to love?

So much so that it hurts
So much more than anyone else
So passionately as to be violent
So violently as to be passionate

We were taught to love
And love is all we do
Yet we let it hurt us so
We let ourselves die in spite of it

Is it wrong to love and hate?

Christ prayed in the Garden
"Spare me"
He loved, he detested
He forgave

Forgive me for loving
Forgive me for hating
Forgive me for doing both at the one time
Or give me reason not to

To Question: Part II - My Kind

2007-09-10T01:50:00.000-07:00

You're the kind of person who makes me think
When i get closer and closer
And shouldn't be thinking

They're the kind of people who'd make me drink
Hide away in a corner
And forget about you

I'm the kind of person who is so bold
Hold your hand when alone
Shrink away in company

Are you more me than ever?
Am i more you
Than those who've been you?

Can I adequately convey to you
The gamut I feel
In a late night typing of words?

It's all i can do to release myself
From what i feel
For you

Still enduring you and them and all else
Make me crawl away and hide/cry
Behind my veneer

All the joys of this life
Are they truly enough?
For the kind of girl who'd make you love

A Second Beginning (and a little more, but still not complete)

2007-09-04T18:19:00.000-07:00

My friend said
I love a vampire
Do you think
He’d let me live in the night?

She’d stay in eternal night
Invite me to join her
And I’d bring you
(I’d take you)

You would be mine
I'd own your night
Just as she'd own mine
And he, hers

A Beginning (to be continued)

2007-09-04T18:18:00.000-07:00

Let us go to the world
Let us be as we were
Let us run
And be free

We all want to grow old
We all want a home
We want to be
(Just be)

For Mel (from MBLG)

2007-09-03T16:11:00.000-07:00

Listen!

What a time we shall have...

What a day to be
Day to be

Free me
Or is it you?

It's better in the dark
We all know it's true

A purple flash
A cape

Remember,
Capes get you killed

Don't get sucked in
Trust what you know

What you see if deceiving
What you hear is off key

What you do is worth nothing
Lest you do unto thee

(no i have no idea what that means,
do you?)

Let's stop our tangential
Forced back on the track

It's no fun on the straight road
How i want to go back

Easy is not hard
Just boring

Keep listening
You might learn something

To my Sisters of the Night

2007-08-31T00:05:00.000-07:00

Fight or flight is a curious response. Governing all but one. Or so it is believed. A deer runs from the hunter. The hunter runs from the bear. A human should run from death.

By curious coincidence i met one who didn't. Endowed as he was with an incurable ailment, he welcomed death as an old friend.

His sister was tormented by his death. To lose one so close - it was understandable. The comfort i could provide seemed not enough. She withdrew, and i saw her infrequently for a time.

We studied together for a few years after. Sharing a flat, we became close. Still, though, her brother lingered on her mind. She frequently disappeared into the night when he was discussed. Often, she would dismiss my insistence he was in a better place; she could have made it so he would not have to die. Unsure of her meaning, i argued not, made do to hold her close as she wept.

Some months passed, i saw her less and less in the evenings. My concern grew as she reverted to her previous, antisocial self. her bright eyes became dull, her vivacious manner turned withdrawn and distressed. At a loss, i confronted her as to her change in mood. A black cloud entered her eyes and she swept from the room.

Determined, i followed after her. Through the dark streets and alleys. My only thought to protect she i had grown to love. Passing into a forest, i grew wary. Tales of creatures that resided there surfaced. Yet i could not leave her be. Not this time.

Near midnight i stumbled upon a clearing bathed in moonlight. In the centre she stood - a goddess transformed. From her radiated a power i had never felt, save for the first time we met. At her feet lay a man, seduced by her power, yet clearly unable to sustain it. He had died, a pitiful fool, as she fed on his essence.

She gazed upon me - I could not have fooled her and slipped away - black eyes gleaming red. I understood all. Her brother could have been free to live. She could have turned him, imparted her power to him. That which she now offered me.

Many years later, she revealed that were it not for her love for me, she would have taken me by force. As it were, i freely accepted to spend eternity with her. Ours is a connection deeper than any. The most devoted of lovers do not reach the love we share.

We remain this way for eternity. Of the night.

To Question: Part 1

2007-08-30T03:07:00.000-07:00

We're all in this together
But are we?

What happens to trust
When you can't trust the shirt on your back?

I trust you to be honest with me
And honest to no one else

Can i trust that you would save me?
Would you truly come and aid me?

A friend in need is a friend indeed.
Or a friend in debt?

I trust you could destroy me
And any chance i have to be.

I trust a thousand lifetimes
And i trust it to hurt.

"Hello starry night..."

2007-08-28T04:20:00.000-07:00

A potrait of you
Mother
Father
Parent

Caregiver you are
Your portrait hangs around us
Painted blue and gray

Better it be known
You hold a rainbow
In your pocket
Are its origin, in fact

I see a thousand pictures
Of every piece of you
From my vantage
And yours

The bright, shining images
Show your playfulness
The life that is not life
Yet is what we are

Points if you can read this

2007-08-28T04:10:00.000-07:00

esnes not tsum ew noitasnes etinifni na. emit lla dna ,tnaw I lla ,wonk I lla dnoyeb uoy evol dluow I wonk uoy ,rehto hcae evol ot eerf ew erew. eb ti tel tonnac I ,uoy gnivol fo thguoht eht ta erusaelp htiw eid I hguoht. su no ton taht hsiw dluow I dna, esnes etinifni eht ni efil etacilpmoc ot si evol ni eb ot. 'evol ni' eb ot ecnahc eht evah ton su tel. uoy evol I

rettel evol a

Two mintue maths poem

2007-08-23T03:50:00.000-07:00

A funeral
Of the dead

A fitting place to be

Sunday best
Left at home

Who the fuck really cares?

Sit ourselves
Masked and not

In the pews of worship

Damned to Hell
Or Heaven, worse

A life of Mathematics

To A Friend

2007-08-21T04:40:00.000-07:00

Run through the garden
Magestic hedges
Of days gone past
Days never happened
And days yet to come

In an ink and paper hailstorm
Can I find the castle within?
A sanctuary
For me and all
All who wish to be

Yet the maze is large
The journey long
The past twisting
Dangerous
Lost

A precipice juts
And i am almost over
Flying away
In a book today
Or tomorrow

Letting you go
I shall return
I cannot stay away
You are too good
You are my friend

Some don't understand
Most do not wish to
The joy, the fun
Adventure
In you

I visit your brothers and sisters
Cousins and such
Hold your children in my arms
Love them
Learn from them

Finding myself at home with you
With few for company
Let me lose myself on the journey
Find your castle, fortress
Remain in you forever

My friend

The Truth is Worse than Anything I could bring Myself to do to You (Take Two)

2007-08-20T04:47:00.000-07:00

I see you

I see you
I saw you
Let me see you

Can we not talk without a code?
A binary vector could not help us
Check digit after digit

Our signals are confused
Our wires are crossed
The message is not getting through

Or is it?
Are we simply ignoring it?
Refusing to see?

Have i not made my communication clear?
Sign, signal, voice, word
Has it not got through?

What do we do?
When communication does not fail
Yet we do nothing

Live as life is
Without change
Happy in stasis

Would this make us happier?
I cannot know...
Nor do i know if you would

Yet i am convinced
You must know
You must be the one to know

To do

I see you

I want you
(I didn't say that)

The Truth is Worse than Anything I could bring Myself to do to You (Take One - aka, piece of crap)

2007-08-17T05:54:00.000-07:00

Do not ask me
What i feel
Do not ask me
If i care

My answer: a resounding yes
I care
I care
I care

As for feeling...
What do we feel?
If not the throes of emotion
Deep within our souls

Anything less is but
A fancy
A fancy
A fancy

Yet i fancy,
I fancy for you
But i will not tell you
Never and a day

So don't ask
I shall not tell
What i feel
Feel for you

A quiet moment
That we can share
Is not enough
It's just not fair

Let's not face it
Delusion is grand
Grandeur of delusion
Fills our minds

What you are
Words cannot describe
Were you to feel what i feel
You could not deny

Were i to feel what you feel
I'd surely not survive
Can we feel together?
Just once

As long as we do not speak
Do not ask about our feeling
Do not ask
Do not ask

The truth
Would destroy
Heart and soul
What would we do then?

I think this sucks, but apparently it doesn't...

2007-08-14T02:49:00.000-07:00

Sorry if i'm a litte too offensive.
It really isn't just the way i am.
We say that life is just an observation
Of everything we never truly want (and what we need)
So i'll give you my own little observations
On how life is supposed to be.

Scream enough when you are born,
For life to already hate you.
A quiet baby's a dead one - and the bath water's already waiting.
Smiles and cute innocence, will get you through childhood.
In adolescence you split in two:
Rebellious, drunken slut.
Studious, stoned whore.
Or a Can-Can hybrid.

I'm now more open to life - I've tasted it and seen it
So, of course, i want it
More than i fucking know i need it.

Monty said to me it was awfully nice to have a cock.
I disagree (but that's just me) - a kitty is much more my style
*wink wink nudge nudge*
I'd like to take a ride (down the street and back) with you.
I'd pull you into my car
We'd fight over who's steering.
Rhumba across a dancefloor - that sexy dance of love.
It's quite boring if you don't mean it
I mean it, but never danced like i have.
Mostly because sex on a dancefloor's not legal.
Heaven knows i stick to the law (if nothing else).

Another little pretty observation:
In a lecture no one gives a shit.
A microcosm of Australia.
Are you attending?
Who fucking cares!
Let's go get a drink.

I will drink vodka, but prefer my beer.
A connoisseur of lager,
Though i know nothing about it.
Let me prove i can hold my drink.
After that i'll balance the bottles into an artwork and auction it off.

I'll make a fortune (hopefully) from my drunken art.
Go and hide on an island when the world pisses me off.
I've already done that (metaphorically) and discovered i really hate the world.
Yet i put up with the world - i know it cannot be changed.
Not by me.

Here's to all life's observations - be they big or small.
Here's to us and us and them - whoever we may be.
Here's to drink and drunken love - rhumba in a car with me.

Heil Rail

2007-08-10T04:36:00.000-07:00

Effectively effective,
The lesser of evils,
My friend I shall meet you this week
(And next).

You are there for my journey,
Beginning, middle and end,
Yet not the prelude
Nor finale.

A motley collection,
Old, young, cold, warm.
I prefer the company of the old
And cold.

Complaints abound
Of you and your minders.
I never really understood,
You’ve been nice to me.

Yet my friends always turn,
You are no different.
A bad day came,
Then another.

Jokingly slow
I cursed your joy
At my frustration
My boredom.

The next day you were sick,
Cancelled our appointments
When I was already waiting
For you.

Changing and changing,
It made no difference.
I ran and ran,
Though I never ran for you before.

Utterly spent
You have destroyed my faith.
Yet I love you still
As I do all.

Word

2007-08-06T22:57:00.000-07:00

What do we put to the world?
That which we articulate
To convey
Understand

Evolution dictates a change
Sign me
Speak to me
Shout at me

With language comes understanding
Or,
More likely,
Confusion

Can we co-exist?
Use a beauty so great
Yet not know
What it means

“What’s in a name?”
A word
An intonation
Which sets our hearts alight

He knew
The Greatness of words
That which confuses
Confounds

Few have truly been privy to this
Most have wanted to share
More and more have we glimpsed it
Unknowingly

Yet we continue
Exploration
A beauty so real
We feel it beyond our consciousness

My First Suicide

2007-08-06T03:58:00.000-07:00

Oliver stands on the hills,
Hair and clothes wet still.
The worthless shaft and twig gripped in his hand
Or hanging loosely, plain and bland.

Gaze at the mottled,
Blue, gray crush.
Will it envelope me still?
If i ask it, will it keep me?

Sing to me
Sweet, Heavenly sounds
For you
Are the last i hear.

Caressed by a pale hand
My cheek grows numb.
Surrender to my longing
Not to long for.

I dreamed of a train today
Of how it passed beneath me.
I watched the empty tracks
And wondered for a moment.

Feel not the pain
My earthen friend
Fear not
The deadly joy

I join you later
Or not at all
Depends
On my last.

Untitled #1 (it kinda sucks)

2007-08-03T05:47:00.000-07:00

Don’t you think it’s funny?
I only met you a minute ago

There’s something to be said
For intelligent conversation

If I don’t know your name
It’s easier to be your friend

If I forget your name
It’s easier to love you

Love without names is so satisfying
Yet unsatisfyingly so

I’d rather scream your name to the World
Than crash silently to the shore

In another minute I might know you
Then we can be friends and love

To Want

2007-07-30T02:20:00.000-07:00

I finally realise the Great Tragedy of want
(for it is not love, I know not of this love)

We hear tell of wanting

A hunger such that one cannot eat
I have felt it

A longing so great one cannot move
I have felt it

A desire to speak such that one cannot speak
I have felt it

Have felt, and fell still
This wanting

I hunger
Yet do not eat

I long for
Yet cannot move

I desire
Yet do not speak

For fear of wanting
My want
And yours

The acknowledgement of our want
The Tragedy of our want

It is all true

A moment

2007-07-27T22:50:00.000-07:00

Look at me, Angel Eyes
For you are all i see

I would not live forever
Were it not for that moment

That one second
When your eyes met mine

And in the stopping of Space and Time
A thousand thought passed between us,
Few that i could hear

You are always happy

Even if your person isn't
Your eyes are still alight

It's a great tragedy when you're sad
When your eyes are not happy

Yet...they retain their beauty
Perhaps even moreso

There's a tear in my heart
As i reach for you

One moment is all
All that we need

I hear those thoughts better now
We need nothing more

I need nothing more
Than to hold you

Gaze into your Angel Eyes
For this one moment in Space and Time

(for you, my Angel Eyed friend)

Smokescreen

2007-07-27T22:40:00.000-07:00

Many a time have i held you
And wanted you to kiss me

Many a time have i touched your hair
And wanted you to touch me

Many a time have i laughed in pain
And wanted you to want me

So we could hold, kiss and touch each other
Or sit still and laugh at pain

Formaldehyde (a song)

2007-07-27T04:32:00.000-07:00

Infect a dying flesh
Pulse through veins of steel
Hunger for remission
Hunger for the rest

Scream my name at the gates
It's not the key but
We'll get you some notice
(of the cost)

Bleed it dry
Hear me cry
As i wait
Drowned and broken (by you)

Wait forever
Is it better?
Than to suffer this longing
Gripped by another

Would i rather die?
Than maintain the hope
Keep this facade
Of not wanting (of not wanting)

Bleed it dry
Hear me cry
As i remain
Drowned and broken (by my own undoing)

________

Hehe, this one rocks!!!

Ponte del Cuore

2007-07-25T00:21:00.001-07:00

All my lovers
And the lovers of my mind

I have found you
Who is one and the same

Or would be
Were it not for us

All of us
Not just you and I

A bridge is always bigger than imagined
This one's no exception

Prepared as we are to cross
Others stay behind

Ultimately we are left alone
A dangerous thought, not just for us lovers

Fear of Heights <=this one (hehehe, this is number13!!!)

2007-07-19T00:08:00.000-07:00

I am thrown
Into the sky
Into your arms
And out of the nearest window

Fling me
So high
Send me to freefall

Excavate me stomach
Rid me of my last meal

As i wait
In the next corridor
for my turn

Is your execution over yet?

Bang the Doldrums

2007-07-18T23:58:00.000-07:00

Best friends
Ex-friends to the end
Better off as lovers
And not the other way around
__________________________________________________

Better off as lovers

How do we resist?

I could easily reach out and touch you
I could tell you
I could show you
How –

Yet I force myself onto another train,
Not yours

The ticket that I never use has your name on it.
So it shall hide, and remain unused.

i forgot what this meant...

2007-07-04T04:34:00.000-07:00

Fold.

Fold again.

And again.

Will you ever stand?

Un-crease the fold?

Allow life?

So walk along.

Smell a rose.

Be.

Is this the last act in the play?

How will you end?

Break the shackles of existence?

Will you be free after that?

In Jubilation

2007-06-18T00:15:00.000-07:00

I love you

You know that don't you?

I couldn't live without you

Or could I?

I'll never let you go

I just did, didn't I?

Should i be cliche?

I want you, I need you

It's true...

Oh God, but is it?

Is it really you?

Today it is tomorrow it isn't

But only for a minute

Then it's always back to you

Deeper

Deeper

Deeper again

How can i possibly feel you this close

When you're always so far away?

I don't care

Let me rejoice

Just knowing you exist

Dreaming that you exist

So let me be

Loving you

To Do With Time

2007-06-08T19:57:00.000-07:00

Is it over yet?
It doesn't feel like it...

(it isn't really, but that's not the point)

There is so much to do before i can sleep
So why am i sleeping now?

Procrastination is an art
and i am a master.

or is it my master?

Time is never satisfying.

Tumultuous

It's always slipping away

and i can't get it back...

An Encouter in Two Parts

2007-06-01T06:17:00.000-07:00

Do I hear your voice?

No...

Is that it again?
Or is my imagination giving us sound?

This scene is silent.
A theatre held in suspense
Shock, horror, awe
At the scene unfolding.

Yet the curtains are still drawn.
This scene is a secret.
Who knows we exist?
It suits us well.

Anonymity is favoured among those who commit such dark deeds as ours.
On whom society may frown and in turn applaud.
Two faces show how we have changed
Two faces show our sameness.

As long as the curtain is drawn
(and we are hiding together)
Keep me here.

Keep me in your embrace, or you in mine.
Keep my forehead to you bosom, or yours to mine.
Keep your hand at my side
As mine caresses your back.

There's much to be said of a dark deed
Countless untold caves with pools of black water
A single stone slab protruding, the crack in the mirror.
Find the darkest place and you have found us.

Once again
Hold me tightly.
Tangle my hands in your hair
Tangle yours in my shirt.

One senses the fire that hides in this place
Though the darkness is impenetrable.
One thinks they hear it yet never do.
We are too clever for that.

Glance into my eyes
I will hold your gaze
I'll not let it go
Not until your eyes can no longer resist the pull of their sockets.

The light should be blinding
All should know.
Yet they are blind to this
To us.

Give me that moment.
Let it be mine.
That one second, one infinitesimal moment of time
Where eyes glaze and hearts cry out

They suspect
They do not
A time may come when all will know
It is not today.

Cry out my name
I'll whisper yours.
Stop time for me
Please... I must have it

As the black pool rocks with turbulence
Waves crash to the shore, against the walls.
The lines blur, the curtain fades
Nothing else matters.

Lay in my arms now
I'll lay in yours.
Keep me forever
My heart on your shores.

The stone silence returns, the black pool is calm.
They wish to be free, as they lay in each other's arms.
All is as it will be
And the curtain flutters in the breeze.

London Calling

2007-05-14T04:21:00.000-07:00

Come in, Come in!
We're so glad you're here!
Rest, be at home
Grow and Learn
Feel comfortable in this space.

---

The outside world is closed to you.
You need to know it
To know how to deal with it.
Don't think of going out there!
All you need to know is here.

---

When you let me stand at the door,
Looking out
Barely interacting.

Do you know how many time's i've snuck out?

I'll stand outside and you'll think i'm still inside.
So much that you don't know,
But do i want to tell you?

Why am i so scared to be me?
Why am i so scared to be you?
I don't want to be you,
Stop showing me our similarities,
Why do we have to be this way?

Tell me i can be myself,
Fuck it, i know i am.

Shit, let's leave this before it degenerates.

_______________

Don't worry, i'm not actually feeling that angry :)